2007

I have no idea what is wrong with me, either aging is in the process or my brain has decided to take a break from the world, you know, i think it's the other way round, it's overworking, mush and gerard use to tell me, whatever number of thoughts an average person thinks, i have double.

"In this sad World of ours, sorrow comes to us all; and to the young, it comes with bitterest agony, because it takes them unawares."

"Every effect must have its cause. The past is the cause of the present, and the present will be the cause of the future. All these are links in the endless chain stretching from the finite to the infinite."

That was said by Abraham Lincoln.

As i reflect on 2006, conjuring up enough memory cell left, the good things that came to into my life, the things i wish i had done or said, the people i wish i could shoot (well, not that many, really).

I have met a man i want to spend the rest of my life with, start a family, something i never thought would happen in a million years, well not to me, maybe to everyone else, well, now that it's here, it's happening to me, i want to embrace it whole-heartedly, look back and see this young lady that drinks, smoke and dance in her own world looking on to this grown woman and know it's ok.

Last few years has allowed me to grow and taught me many things about life and people, family, work. I don't want to relive most of it... a lot of it was hard work and it's certainly work I don't want to have to do again. Yet I don't regret it... well most of it anyway.

I have drifted away from friends, and I have gained some friends. Friends have moved away from me, and some have moved back to me. The friends I cherish most are still a firm part of my everyday life - and that means more to me than I could explain.

I have become a better person... I have hurt some people and been hurt in order to become this - but I think they too would say it was well worth it.

I have learnt to live, to cherish the moment, to take life as it comes, to be happy, to smile when I don't feel like it, to open myself up and most importantly to love.

I know this year will be better than the last, watching my life pass me by, i don't want to waste my day... *i feel a song here...* Now that the year has come, time is ushering me off, pushing me from my back, saying it's time to move forward, it's now or never missy. Saying goodbye has never been a friend of mine. I feel equipped to tackle whatever is thrown my way...